Tue Aug 17, 2010 12:58 am
The Scoundrels at Fonhaj
Fonhaj is a company near me. I need to vent my anger here.
I am writing this letter because I take issue with some of Fonhaj's Ponzi schemes. Instead of focusing on why the basic law of the jungle is "survival of the fittest", not "survival of insensitive, savage egotists who use terms of opprobrium such as 'conceited exponents of anti-intellectualism' and 'superstitious ranters' to castigate whomever Fonhaj opposes", I would like to remind people that Fonhaj is an organizations that invents nothing, originates nothing, and improves nothing. All it does is have more impact on Earth's biological, geological, and chemical systems during our lifetime and our children's than all preceding human generations had together. Pardon me for not being able to empathize with the worst sorts of hotheaded misfits I've ever seen, but I admit that I'm not perfect. I admit that I may have been a bit disloyal when I stated that Fonhaj and its apostles are the apocalyptic riders of world annihilation. Still, that doesn't justify the name-calling, rudeness, and simple ugliness that Fonhaj invariably finds so necessary. Nor does it justify its preaching a propaganda of hate. Fortunately, if you ever get into an argument with some of Fonhaj's lieutenants about whether or not as a dynamic historical current, despotism has taken many different forms and has evolved dramatically in some ways, I have an excellent sockdolager for you. Simply inform the other party that Fonhaj doesn't care about freedom as it can neither sell it nor put it in the bank. It's just a word to it.
When you reflect upon this, you'll realize that Fonhaj undoubtedly doesn't want me to yank up the most wretched pedants I've ever seen from the dark rocks under which they hide and flaunt them before the bright sunshine of public exposure. Well, I've never been a very obedient dog so I intend not only to do exactly that but also to shoo away Fonhaj like the annoying bug that it is. I have taken the liberty of letting Fonhaj know that with it so forcefully pooh-poohing the reams of solid evidence pointing to the existence and operation of a snotty coterie of officialism, things are starting to come to a head. That's why we must resolve our disputes without violence. Don't kid yourself: Fonhaj's commentaries are not witty satire, as it would have you believe. They're simply the hateful ramblings of something that has no idea or appreciation of what it's mocking. This is particularly interesting when you consider that this is a lesson for those with eyes to see. It is a lesson not so much about Fonhaj's incoherent behavior but about the way that Fonhaj is too ill-bred to read the writing on the wall. This writing warns that if we let it replace discourse and open dialogue with profligate practices and blatant ugliness, all we'll have to look forward to in the future is a public realm devoid of culture and a narrow and routinized professional life untouched by the highest creations of civilization.
For the sake of the universe, I hope that this is the only planet that contains filthy backstabbers like Fonhaj. To state it in stark and simple terms, over time, Fonhaj's jeremiads have progressed from being merely patronizing to being superpatronizing, hyperpatronizing, and recently ultrapatronizing. In fact, I'd say that now they're even megapatronizing. It is quite true, of course, that Fonhaj's hariolations represent a calculated assault on diversity within our community. But Fonhaj has repeatedly indicated a desire to impose a one-size-fits-all model on how society should function. Is that the sound of rarefied respectability that Fonhaj's secret agents so frequently attribute to Fonhaj? The improvident blathering of a superficial, self-deceiving killjoy is more like it. In fact, Fonhaj possesses no significant intellectual skills whatsoever and has no interest in erudition. Heck, it can't even spell or define "erudition", much less achieve it.
Fonhaj contends that space aliens are out to lay eggs in our innards or ooze their alien hell-slime all over us. Excuse me, but where exactly did this little factoid come from? Paternalism is a plague upon us all, a pox that will likely not be erased in the lifetime of any reader of this letter. To Fonhaj, however, it's merely a convenient mechanism for hamstringing our efforts to fight for our freedom of speech. People often get the impression that lascivious, blasphemous freaks of nature and Fonhaj's provocateurs are separate entities. Not so. When one catches cold, the other sneezes. As proof, note that Fonhaj has a natural talent for complaining. It can find any aspect of life and whine about it for hours upon hours.
All right, enough of that. Now let's talk about something else. Let's talk about how Fonhaj has already begun suborning balmy schmucks to promote group-think attitudes over individual insights. I wish I were joking, but I'm not. What's more, if we let Fonhaj scrap the notion of national sovereignty, then greed, corruption, and clericalism will characterize the government. Oppressive measures will be directed against citizens. And lies and deceit will be the stock-in-trade of the media and educational institutions.
Fonhaj contends that free speech is wonderful as long as you're not bashing it and the anal-retentive, stiff-necked enemies of the people in its flock. Sounds rather uncontrollable, doesn't it? Well, that's Fonhaj for you.
The problem with Fonhaj is not that it's obtuse. It's that it wants to force me to undergo "treatment" to cure my "problem". Fonhaj really ought to to take something for its hysterical paranoia. I've heard that chlorpromazine works well. Truly, some sort of medication should awaken Fonhaj to the fact that it has been trying to convince us that it is a protective bulwark against the advancing tyranny of what I call stupid, untrustworthy brutes. That argument fails to take into account the reality that Fonhaj says that the few of us who complain regularly about its calumnies are simply spoiling the party. That is the most despicable lie I have ever heard in my entire life.
Fonhaj's cause is not glorious. It is not wonderful. It is not good.
Just because Fonhaj and its habitués don't like being labelled as "power-drunk, sniveling fussbudgets" or "belligerent idiots" doesn't mean the shoe doesn't fit. All the same, Fonhaj is a financial predator who preys on the elderly, the gullible, and the vulnerable. It seeks their assets to support its own lavish existence. Keep that in mind while I state the following: Fonhaj can't possibly believe that it knows the "right" way to read Plato, Maimonides, and Machiavelli. It's lackadaisical but it's not that lackadaisical.
Fonhaj should work with us, not step in at the eleventh hour and hog all the glory. Society must soon decide either to bring important information about Fonhaj's frightful, stroppy insinuations into the limelight or else to let Fonhaj create a world without history, without philosophy, without science, without reason—a world without beauty of any kind, without art, without literature, without culture. The decision is one of life or death, peaceful existence or perpetual social fever. I can hope only that those in charge realize that I, hardheaded cynic that I am, trust Fonhaj about as far as I can throw it. Well, that's another story. To get back to my main point, I ought to mention that Fonhaj insists that the best way to serve one's country is to dam the flow of effective communication. How can it be so blind? Very easily. Basically, there are those who are informed and educated about the evils of antinomianism, and there are those who are not. Fonhaj is one of the uninformed, naturally, and that's why it needs to internalize the external truth that the mindless zombies who believe its crude story that ethical responsibility is merely a trammel of earthbound mortals and should not be required of a demigod like it are also the people most likely to create an ideological climate that will enable Fonhaj to place confused pantywaists at the top of the social hierarchy. But that's not all: When it tells us that it never engages in sinful, noxious, or simple-minded politics, it somehow fails to mention that anyone who thinks that men are spare parts in the social repertoire—mere optional extras—is not living in the real world. It fails to mention that I find its casus belli rather minatory. And it fails to mention that it is right about one thing, namely that fear is what motivates us. Fear of what it means when querulous long-haired hippies scar little children's self-image. Fear of what it says about our society when we teach our children that it is clean and bright and pure inside. And fear of uninformed guttersnipes like Fonhaj who inspire a recrudescence of manipulative fatuity. That's all I have time now to write. If you want to get more insight into Fonhaj's mentality, though, then study the details of its recommendations. Try to see the big picture: It will amaze you. It will take your breath away. And it will convince you that Fonhaj's policies reflect a rude bias that will utilize questionable and illegal fund-raising techniques before you know it.
Would Fonhaj like it if I were mealymouthed and thrasonical, too? I don't think so. Call me phlegmatic if you'd like; I, not being one of the many mindless duffers of this world, will still do everything in my power to expose the connections between the mephitic problems that face us and the key issues of serfism and poststructuralism. Then, I will announce to the world that Fonhaj often argues that a knowledge of correct diction, even if unused, evinces a superiority that covers cowardice or stupidity. A similar argument was first made over 1200 years ago by a well-known peddler of snake-oil remedies and was quickly disproved. In those days, however, no one would have doubted that many people are looking for a modern-day Moses who will split the sea of commercialism and express our concerns about Fonhaj's insecure, chthonic teachings. I can't claim that I'm the right person for the job, but I can say that Fonhaj makes a living out of careerism. I call this tactic of its "entrepreneurial careerism". Fonhaj and its mercenaries have really raised entrepreneurial careerism to a fine art by using it to denigrate and discard all of Western culture.
While I contend that Fonhaj has every right to its stingy opinions, this makes me fearful that I might someday find myself in the crosshairs of its sullen, clueless litanies. (To be honest, though, it wouldn't be the first time.) Sure, the things Fonhaj does are wrong, xenophobic, cranky, birdbrained—you name it. But it is addicted to the feeling of power, to the idea of controlling people. Sadly, it has no real concern for the welfare or the destiny of the people it desires to lead. Fonhaj says that it is omnipotent. That is the most despicable lie I have ever heard in my entire life. It is quite true, of course, that Fonhaj eschews it commitments to responsibility and truth in favor of a breathless and drooling enthusiasm for gangsterism. But Fonhaj has, on a number of occasions, expressed a desire to marginalize me based on my gender, race, or religion. On all of these occasions I submitted to the advice of my friends, who assured me that its spin doctors distract attention from more important issues, as though it were a disgrace to show it how it is as wrong as wrong can be. Now that that's cleared up, I'll continue with what I was saying before, that failure to define our terms more clearly will lead to a deluge of complaints by its provocateurs. No joke.
Fonhaj has no discernible talents. The only things it has indisputably mastered are biological functions. Well, I suppose Fonhaj is also good at convincing people that it has the linguistic prowess to produce a masterwork of meritorious literature, but my point is that Fonhaj's consistent lack of regard for others will feed blind hatred in the immediate years ahead. Now I could go off on that point alone, but like a verbal magician, it knows how to lie without appearing to be lying, how to bury secrets in mountains of garbage-speak. The foregoing greatly simplifies the real situation but it does indicate in a rough, general way that Fonhaj has gone around the bend with its paranoia. Why do I tell you this? Because these days, no one else has the guts to.
Fonhaj's seemingly egalitarian ideas lead only to results that are both raucous and unfair. Let me express that same thought in slightly different terms: Those who fail to learn from history are doomed to repeat it. Of course, if Fonhaj had learned anything from history, it'd know that I will not stand by and let anyone twist my words or change my position in order to serve some profligate political strategy. There's no need here to present any evidence of that; examples can be found all over the World Wide Web. In fact, a simple search will quickly reveal that to Fonhaj's mind, its epithets enhance performance standards, productivity, and competitiveness. So that means that newspapers should report only on items it agrees with, right? No, not right. The truth is that we must soon make one of the most momentous decisions in history. We must decide whether to let Fonhaj put political correctness ahead of scientific rigor or, alternatively, whether we should justify condemnation, constructive criticism, and ridicule of it and its viperine, Pecksniffian tracts. Upon this decision rests the stability of society and the future peace of the world. My view on this decision is that Fonhaj promotes a victimization hierarchy. It and its representatives appear at the top of the hierarchy, naturally, and therefore feel that they deserve to be given more money, support, power, etc. than anyone else. Other groups, depending on Fonhaj's view of them, are further down the list. At the bottom are those of us who realize that many scholars have already concluded that Fonhaj's scare tactics are highly wretched. Nevertheless, it's still worth reexamining them in the light of new information, new research, and new insights. Doing so is sure to reveal that Fonhaj is like a pigeon. Pigeons are too self-absorbed to care about anyone else. They poo on people they don't like; they poo on people they don't even know. The only real difference between Fonhaj and a pigeon is that Fonhaj intends to take credit for others' accomplishments. That's why I respect the English language and believe in the use of words as a means of communication. Depraved hellions like Fonhaj, however, consider spoken communication as merely a set of noises uttered to excite emotions in oleaginous boneheads in order to convince them to take over society's eyes, ears, mind, and spirit.
While we may all pray for a perfect utopian world in which everyone is holding hands and singing "We Are the World" in perfect harmony, the reality is that someone has to be willing to expose all of Fonhaj's filthy, subversive, and destructive activities. Even if it's not polite to do so. Even if it hurts a lot of people's feelings. Even if everyone else is pretending that genocide, slavery, racism, and the systematic oppression, degradation, and exploitation of most of the world's people are all thoroughly justified. I must emphasize that Fonhaj is hardly the first proponent of stubborn, repulsive misoneism and it is unlikely to be the last. Don't make the mistake of thinking otherwise. Fonhaj does, and that's why it will probably respond to this letter just like it responds to all criticism. It will put me down as "beastly" or "scabrous". That's its standard answer to everyone who says or writes anything about it except the most fawning praise.
I strive to be consistent in my arguments. I can't say that I'm 100% true to this, but Fonhaj's frequent vacillating leads me to believe that I find that some of its choices of words in its communiqués would not have been mine. For example, I would have substituted "callous" for "interparenthetically" and "unenlightened" for "galvanocauterization."
One of the goals of nihilism is to render meaningless the words "best" and "worst". Fonhaj admires that philosophy because, by annihilating human perceptions of quality, Fonhaj's own mediocrity can flourish. Yes, Virginia, we wouldn't have a problem with demagogism if it weren't for Fonhaj. Although it created the problem, aggravated the problem, and escalated the problem, Fonhaj insists that it can solve the problem if we just grant it more power. How naïve does it think we are? Truly, most people don't realize that Fonhaj has already revealed its plans to put neo-insensitive witlings on the federal payroll. It revealed these plans in a manifesto bearing all of the hallmarks of having been written by a naive gadfly. Not only is its manifesto entirely lacking in logic, relentlessly subjective, and totally anecdotal, but Fonhaj doesn't want me to recognize and respect the opinions, practices, and behavior of others. Well, I've never been a very obedient dog so I intend not only to do exactly that but also to redefine in practical terms the immutable ideals that have guided us from the beginning.
Fonhaj's theatrics are not the solution to our problem. They are the problem. It wasn't so long ago that people like you and me were free to test the assumptions that underlie Fonhaj's op-ed pieces. Recently, that's become a lot harder to do. What happened that changed things so much? To put it briefly, Fonhaj happened. By impairing the practice of democracy, Fonhaj has managed to provide cynical perverts with a milieu in which they can organize a whispering campaign against me. We must stand united as free, sovereign individuals and get Fonhaj off our backs. And that's why I say to you: Have courage. Be honest. And solve the problems that are important to most people. That's the patriotic thing to do, and that's the right thing to do.
God, I feel better now.
Too long; Didn't read?
Fonhaj sucks.
I am writing this letter because I take issue with some of Fonhaj's Ponzi schemes. Instead of focusing on why the basic law of the jungle is "survival of the fittest", not "survival of insensitive, savage egotists who use terms of opprobrium such as 'conceited exponents of anti-intellectualism' and 'superstitious ranters' to castigate whomever Fonhaj opposes", I would like to remind people that Fonhaj is an organizations that invents nothing, originates nothing, and improves nothing. All it does is have more impact on Earth's biological, geological, and chemical systems during our lifetime and our children's than all preceding human generations had together. Pardon me for not being able to empathize with the worst sorts of hotheaded misfits I've ever seen, but I admit that I'm not perfect. I admit that I may have been a bit disloyal when I stated that Fonhaj and its apostles are the apocalyptic riders of world annihilation. Still, that doesn't justify the name-calling, rudeness, and simple ugliness that Fonhaj invariably finds so necessary. Nor does it justify its preaching a propaganda of hate. Fortunately, if you ever get into an argument with some of Fonhaj's lieutenants about whether or not as a dynamic historical current, despotism has taken many different forms and has evolved dramatically in some ways, I have an excellent sockdolager for you. Simply inform the other party that Fonhaj doesn't care about freedom as it can neither sell it nor put it in the bank. It's just a word to it.
When you reflect upon this, you'll realize that Fonhaj undoubtedly doesn't want me to yank up the most wretched pedants I've ever seen from the dark rocks under which they hide and flaunt them before the bright sunshine of public exposure. Well, I've never been a very obedient dog so I intend not only to do exactly that but also to shoo away Fonhaj like the annoying bug that it is. I have taken the liberty of letting Fonhaj know that with it so forcefully pooh-poohing the reams of solid evidence pointing to the existence and operation of a snotty coterie of officialism, things are starting to come to a head. That's why we must resolve our disputes without violence. Don't kid yourself: Fonhaj's commentaries are not witty satire, as it would have you believe. They're simply the hateful ramblings of something that has no idea or appreciation of what it's mocking. This is particularly interesting when you consider that this is a lesson for those with eyes to see. It is a lesson not so much about Fonhaj's incoherent behavior but about the way that Fonhaj is too ill-bred to read the writing on the wall. This writing warns that if we let it replace discourse and open dialogue with profligate practices and blatant ugliness, all we'll have to look forward to in the future is a public realm devoid of culture and a narrow and routinized professional life untouched by the highest creations of civilization.
For the sake of the universe, I hope that this is the only planet that contains filthy backstabbers like Fonhaj. To state it in stark and simple terms, over time, Fonhaj's jeremiads have progressed from being merely patronizing to being superpatronizing, hyperpatronizing, and recently ultrapatronizing. In fact, I'd say that now they're even megapatronizing. It is quite true, of course, that Fonhaj's hariolations represent a calculated assault on diversity within our community. But Fonhaj has repeatedly indicated a desire to impose a one-size-fits-all model on how society should function. Is that the sound of rarefied respectability that Fonhaj's secret agents so frequently attribute to Fonhaj? The improvident blathering of a superficial, self-deceiving killjoy is more like it. In fact, Fonhaj possesses no significant intellectual skills whatsoever and has no interest in erudition. Heck, it can't even spell or define "erudition", much less achieve it.
Fonhaj contends that space aliens are out to lay eggs in our innards or ooze their alien hell-slime all over us. Excuse me, but where exactly did this little factoid come from? Paternalism is a plague upon us all, a pox that will likely not be erased in the lifetime of any reader of this letter. To Fonhaj, however, it's merely a convenient mechanism for hamstringing our efforts to fight for our freedom of speech. People often get the impression that lascivious, blasphemous freaks of nature and Fonhaj's provocateurs are separate entities. Not so. When one catches cold, the other sneezes. As proof, note that Fonhaj has a natural talent for complaining. It can find any aspect of life and whine about it for hours upon hours.
All right, enough of that. Now let's talk about something else. Let's talk about how Fonhaj has already begun suborning balmy schmucks to promote group-think attitudes over individual insights. I wish I were joking, but I'm not. What's more, if we let Fonhaj scrap the notion of national sovereignty, then greed, corruption, and clericalism will characterize the government. Oppressive measures will be directed against citizens. And lies and deceit will be the stock-in-trade of the media and educational institutions.
Fonhaj contends that free speech is wonderful as long as you're not bashing it and the anal-retentive, stiff-necked enemies of the people in its flock. Sounds rather uncontrollable, doesn't it? Well, that's Fonhaj for you.
The problem with Fonhaj is not that it's obtuse. It's that it wants to force me to undergo "treatment" to cure my "problem". Fonhaj really ought to to take something for its hysterical paranoia. I've heard that chlorpromazine works well. Truly, some sort of medication should awaken Fonhaj to the fact that it has been trying to convince us that it is a protective bulwark against the advancing tyranny of what I call stupid, untrustworthy brutes. That argument fails to take into account the reality that Fonhaj says that the few of us who complain regularly about its calumnies are simply spoiling the party. That is the most despicable lie I have ever heard in my entire life.
Fonhaj's cause is not glorious. It is not wonderful. It is not good.
Just because Fonhaj and its habitués don't like being labelled as "power-drunk, sniveling fussbudgets" or "belligerent idiots" doesn't mean the shoe doesn't fit. All the same, Fonhaj is a financial predator who preys on the elderly, the gullible, and the vulnerable. It seeks their assets to support its own lavish existence. Keep that in mind while I state the following: Fonhaj can't possibly believe that it knows the "right" way to read Plato, Maimonides, and Machiavelli. It's lackadaisical but it's not that lackadaisical.
Fonhaj should work with us, not step in at the eleventh hour and hog all the glory. Society must soon decide either to bring important information about Fonhaj's frightful, stroppy insinuations into the limelight or else to let Fonhaj create a world without history, without philosophy, without science, without reason—a world without beauty of any kind, without art, without literature, without culture. The decision is one of life or death, peaceful existence or perpetual social fever. I can hope only that those in charge realize that I, hardheaded cynic that I am, trust Fonhaj about as far as I can throw it. Well, that's another story. To get back to my main point, I ought to mention that Fonhaj insists that the best way to serve one's country is to dam the flow of effective communication. How can it be so blind? Very easily. Basically, there are those who are informed and educated about the evils of antinomianism, and there are those who are not. Fonhaj is one of the uninformed, naturally, and that's why it needs to internalize the external truth that the mindless zombies who believe its crude story that ethical responsibility is merely a trammel of earthbound mortals and should not be required of a demigod like it are also the people most likely to create an ideological climate that will enable Fonhaj to place confused pantywaists at the top of the social hierarchy. But that's not all: When it tells us that it never engages in sinful, noxious, or simple-minded politics, it somehow fails to mention that anyone who thinks that men are spare parts in the social repertoire—mere optional extras—is not living in the real world. It fails to mention that I find its casus belli rather minatory. And it fails to mention that it is right about one thing, namely that fear is what motivates us. Fear of what it means when querulous long-haired hippies scar little children's self-image. Fear of what it says about our society when we teach our children that it is clean and bright and pure inside. And fear of uninformed guttersnipes like Fonhaj who inspire a recrudescence of manipulative fatuity. That's all I have time now to write. If you want to get more insight into Fonhaj's mentality, though, then study the details of its recommendations. Try to see the big picture: It will amaze you. It will take your breath away. And it will convince you that Fonhaj's policies reflect a rude bias that will utilize questionable and illegal fund-raising techniques before you know it.
Would Fonhaj like it if I were mealymouthed and thrasonical, too? I don't think so. Call me phlegmatic if you'd like; I, not being one of the many mindless duffers of this world, will still do everything in my power to expose the connections between the mephitic problems that face us and the key issues of serfism and poststructuralism. Then, I will announce to the world that Fonhaj often argues that a knowledge of correct diction, even if unused, evinces a superiority that covers cowardice or stupidity. A similar argument was first made over 1200 years ago by a well-known peddler of snake-oil remedies and was quickly disproved. In those days, however, no one would have doubted that many people are looking for a modern-day Moses who will split the sea of commercialism and express our concerns about Fonhaj's insecure, chthonic teachings. I can't claim that I'm the right person for the job, but I can say that Fonhaj makes a living out of careerism. I call this tactic of its "entrepreneurial careerism". Fonhaj and its mercenaries have really raised entrepreneurial careerism to a fine art by using it to denigrate and discard all of Western culture.
While I contend that Fonhaj has every right to its stingy opinions, this makes me fearful that I might someday find myself in the crosshairs of its sullen, clueless litanies. (To be honest, though, it wouldn't be the first time.) Sure, the things Fonhaj does are wrong, xenophobic, cranky, birdbrained—you name it. But it is addicted to the feeling of power, to the idea of controlling people. Sadly, it has no real concern for the welfare or the destiny of the people it desires to lead. Fonhaj says that it is omnipotent. That is the most despicable lie I have ever heard in my entire life. It is quite true, of course, that Fonhaj eschews it commitments to responsibility and truth in favor of a breathless and drooling enthusiasm for gangsterism. But Fonhaj has, on a number of occasions, expressed a desire to marginalize me based on my gender, race, or religion. On all of these occasions I submitted to the advice of my friends, who assured me that its spin doctors distract attention from more important issues, as though it were a disgrace to show it how it is as wrong as wrong can be. Now that that's cleared up, I'll continue with what I was saying before, that failure to define our terms more clearly will lead to a deluge of complaints by its provocateurs. No joke.
Fonhaj has no discernible talents. The only things it has indisputably mastered are biological functions. Well, I suppose Fonhaj is also good at convincing people that it has the linguistic prowess to produce a masterwork of meritorious literature, but my point is that Fonhaj's consistent lack of regard for others will feed blind hatred in the immediate years ahead. Now I could go off on that point alone, but like a verbal magician, it knows how to lie without appearing to be lying, how to bury secrets in mountains of garbage-speak. The foregoing greatly simplifies the real situation but it does indicate in a rough, general way that Fonhaj has gone around the bend with its paranoia. Why do I tell you this? Because these days, no one else has the guts to.
Fonhaj's seemingly egalitarian ideas lead only to results that are both raucous and unfair. Let me express that same thought in slightly different terms: Those who fail to learn from history are doomed to repeat it. Of course, if Fonhaj had learned anything from history, it'd know that I will not stand by and let anyone twist my words or change my position in order to serve some profligate political strategy. There's no need here to present any evidence of that; examples can be found all over the World Wide Web. In fact, a simple search will quickly reveal that to Fonhaj's mind, its epithets enhance performance standards, productivity, and competitiveness. So that means that newspapers should report only on items it agrees with, right? No, not right. The truth is that we must soon make one of the most momentous decisions in history. We must decide whether to let Fonhaj put political correctness ahead of scientific rigor or, alternatively, whether we should justify condemnation, constructive criticism, and ridicule of it and its viperine, Pecksniffian tracts. Upon this decision rests the stability of society and the future peace of the world. My view on this decision is that Fonhaj promotes a victimization hierarchy. It and its representatives appear at the top of the hierarchy, naturally, and therefore feel that they deserve to be given more money, support, power, etc. than anyone else. Other groups, depending on Fonhaj's view of them, are further down the list. At the bottom are those of us who realize that many scholars have already concluded that Fonhaj's scare tactics are highly wretched. Nevertheless, it's still worth reexamining them in the light of new information, new research, and new insights. Doing so is sure to reveal that Fonhaj is like a pigeon. Pigeons are too self-absorbed to care about anyone else. They poo on people they don't like; they poo on people they don't even know. The only real difference between Fonhaj and a pigeon is that Fonhaj intends to take credit for others' accomplishments. That's why I respect the English language and believe in the use of words as a means of communication. Depraved hellions like Fonhaj, however, consider spoken communication as merely a set of noises uttered to excite emotions in oleaginous boneheads in order to convince them to take over society's eyes, ears, mind, and spirit.
While we may all pray for a perfect utopian world in which everyone is holding hands and singing "We Are the World" in perfect harmony, the reality is that someone has to be willing to expose all of Fonhaj's filthy, subversive, and destructive activities. Even if it's not polite to do so. Even if it hurts a lot of people's feelings. Even if everyone else is pretending that genocide, slavery, racism, and the systematic oppression, degradation, and exploitation of most of the world's people are all thoroughly justified. I must emphasize that Fonhaj is hardly the first proponent of stubborn, repulsive misoneism and it is unlikely to be the last. Don't make the mistake of thinking otherwise. Fonhaj does, and that's why it will probably respond to this letter just like it responds to all criticism. It will put me down as "beastly" or "scabrous". That's its standard answer to everyone who says or writes anything about it except the most fawning praise.
I strive to be consistent in my arguments. I can't say that I'm 100% true to this, but Fonhaj's frequent vacillating leads me to believe that I find that some of its choices of words in its communiqués would not have been mine. For example, I would have substituted "callous" for "interparenthetically" and "unenlightened" for "galvanocauterization."
One of the goals of nihilism is to render meaningless the words "best" and "worst". Fonhaj admires that philosophy because, by annihilating human perceptions of quality, Fonhaj's own mediocrity can flourish. Yes, Virginia, we wouldn't have a problem with demagogism if it weren't for Fonhaj. Although it created the problem, aggravated the problem, and escalated the problem, Fonhaj insists that it can solve the problem if we just grant it more power. How naïve does it think we are? Truly, most people don't realize that Fonhaj has already revealed its plans to put neo-insensitive witlings on the federal payroll. It revealed these plans in a manifesto bearing all of the hallmarks of having been written by a naive gadfly. Not only is its manifesto entirely lacking in logic, relentlessly subjective, and totally anecdotal, but Fonhaj doesn't want me to recognize and respect the opinions, practices, and behavior of others. Well, I've never been a very obedient dog so I intend not only to do exactly that but also to redefine in practical terms the immutable ideals that have guided us from the beginning.
Fonhaj's theatrics are not the solution to our problem. They are the problem. It wasn't so long ago that people like you and me were free to test the assumptions that underlie Fonhaj's op-ed pieces. Recently, that's become a lot harder to do. What happened that changed things so much? To put it briefly, Fonhaj happened. By impairing the practice of democracy, Fonhaj has managed to provide cynical perverts with a milieu in which they can organize a whispering campaign against me. We must stand united as free, sovereign individuals and get Fonhaj off our backs. And that's why I say to you: Have courage. Be honest. And solve the problems that are important to most people. That's the patriotic thing to do, and that's the right thing to do.
God, I feel better now.
Too long; Didn't read?
Fonhaj sucks.